50 Things That You Should Not Tweet
- You are bored.
- You haven’t tweeted in a while because you can’t think of anything to say.
- No one understands you in this two bit town.
- Amy and Jessica are so un-cool and Tiffany is a slut (unless you have pictures).
- You will tell only the truth here.
- You went off your diet – again.
- You just love the new single by (put favorite pop idol here).
- You got so drunk last night… (unless you have pictures).
- It rained (or didn’t rain) today.
- A politition sucks or a politician is wonderful.
- You skipped classes today because you are so sick, or depressed, or bored.
- You don’t feel like doing your homework assignment.
- A picture of yourself in your Zena Warrior Princess outfit.
- Football scores or Futebol scores or Soccer scores.
- You and your boyfriend are so much in love that you can’t believe it.
- Anything at all about Indian Cricket.
- A haiku that you wrote yourself.
- The conversation that you had with God.
- You are so depressed today.
- Everything went wrong today.
- Your cancer is still in remission.
- The latest video game that you played.
- That you are a blue guy in a red state or a red guy in a blue state.
- Links to your cruise pictures.
- Your favorite blond joke.
- ThisĀ is waste of time because you know that nobody will understand what you are really trying to say.
- This is your first tweet.
- Doctor Destructo is not your real name.
- A link to any page with aligned=right, marquee or blink.
- A link to any page that uses more than 2 font sizes or colors.
- A link to any page with JavaScript alert messages.
- You’ve found the perfect man – again.
- Links to video game screen shots.
- Private messages to the only person who follows your tweets.
- “This time it will be different”, in regards to weight loss, love life, or quitting smoking.
- Random pictures of things in your yard.
- Another picture of your damn cat.
- A YouTube.com link to a skateboarder breaking his arm.
- Pictures of the strange sore on your lip.
- How long you had to wait for the bus this morning.
- Your high score in Guitar Hero.
- Ebay auctions that you didn’t win.
- Pictures of yourself taken in the mirror that are mostly flash.
- Any sentence that begins: I know no one wants to hear this, but…
- Where you finally found your keys.
- What creature you found in the Chinese Food you ate last night.
- A picture of your dog with his tongue in your mouth.
- You can’t remember the last time you met a nice girl.
- The color of your puke (or anything else that comes out of your body).
- Where you found the hamster after it went missing for a week.