Last month Poker Jim and I went down to Baltimore with tickets to Antiques Roadshow. I am sorry that I’ve taken so long to get back about it. The images have been sitting in the camera and I’ve been mostly sitting on my ass. Getting up at 5:30AM to run around the lake hits me around 7PM and I am useless as far as getting any computer work done.

I wanted to drive, but Jim is a train guy and so we took Amtrak down to Baltimore.

That’s Poker Jim above and there he is again in our seats. Amtrak is a good way to go, if a little expensive on the east coast. If you count the cost of gas and wear and tear on the truck, though, it is almost reasonable. It is comfortable and quiet, except for the woman in the next seat who talked everyone near to death.

When we got to the show we had to spend nearly three hours on line. We got there around 2:30 and didn’t get to see anyone until after 5PM.. Photography is not permitted on the set and the pictures of the line with all the odd people didn’t come out.

These are the tickets that I was given by the triage people. The furniture one was autographed by Wendall Garret, the expert who looked at Larry’s box.

I collect old SF magazines, old Microphones and Amps. I wasn’t going to bring my mics and amps as they are too obscure and I know the value of my magazines to the penny. I asked my brother for some antiques and he came up with this watch. It is engraved, Eddie Bauer, and says Christmas 1885. I stood in line to find that the watch is worth $150 and that the Eddie Bauer store didn’t start until 1920 so this is a different Eddie Bauer.

Growing up, we lived about 3 miles from the West Nyack Dump (Clarkstown Sanitary Landfill) and on weekends Larry and I would go down to the junk section (not trash or garbage – only a dump aficionado would know the difference.) Larry, especially, found many treasures. I was older and I had discovered sex, drugs and rock and roll at that time, so I didn’t go as often. One of the things that he brought home was this walnut box. I brought this down hoping to get the interest of one of the Keno twins. There was only one there and he was on dinner break so I worked with Wendell Garret, the guy in the wheelchair.

The box is a Federal shaving box. It would sit on the top of a gentleman’s dresser and hold his shaving stuff. There were inserts that held a mirror. Wendell examined the drawer, which is all hand made dovetails with no nails, just some pegs.
It is walnut covered pine made from 1820 to 1850 in the New York area, value $300 to $500. That’s a nice find for a dump!

I also brought a quilt made of cigarette silks from around 1900, but no one felt like looking at it and some guy said it might be worth $100, but he doubted it. Jim brought an old Indian blanket that he thought was worth thousands, but is not worth much of anything so he was bummed out.

If you go to Antiques Roadshow, get there early! It doesn’t matter what time your ticket says. Get there early. Do not bring jewelry, silver or collectibles as these lines extend around the block and take hours of more waiting. Bring textiles, rugs, furniture, folk crafts, Native American crafts or fine art. These lines were short. I was amazed to see firearms was a long line. (The police check the guns to make sure they are not loaded before you can get in.)

Many people wore their Roadshow outfits, sort of like the old Let’s Make A Deal. Don’t bother, it won’t help you get on TV. Only bring two things per person. They are very careful that you can’t have more than two appraisals. I saw people with large carts full of crap. I saw lots of ordinary stuff that you might see at flea markets. It was almost as though people couldn’t find any real antiques to bring.

The appraisers work from 8AM to 8PM so they are pooped out by lunch and are not in a real good mood. Some fans are very aggressive and I think that the appraisers are not very happy, so don’t waste their time. Make sure you are polite, don’t push things and thank them. I found a good way to perk them up was to ask if they got on TV today and then they come alive and tell you about their great find.

I am going to try again to get tickets, now that I know the ropes.

I remembered the scene in Neuromancer where Molly and Chase went to Baltimore and ate crab cakes. (I think it was Neuromancer.) Since I was in Baltimore, I had to get crab cakes and asked a few people where the best place would be. Three times I was told to go to Moe’s Seafood, so that’s where Jim and I went. I got two lump crab cakes that were nearly as big as my head and I had trouble finishing them. If you ever go to Baltimore, stop by Moe’s -the best crab cake that I’ve ever had.

Next stop Camden Yards.

I am not a Baseball guy, although I played in little league and we won the local championship. The last time that I cared about a team was back when the Pittsburgh Pirates were in the race – a very long time ago. I’ve been to outings with friends to Shea Stadium, but I was not really into it.

Camden Yards, seems to be the perfect Baseball Stadium. It is small and intimate. The fans were great and seemed to be passionate without being too crazy. I didn’t see the Shea stadium brand of drunks and idiots. The crowd was not as noisy as the NY fans, either. I had a great time, even if I don’t know (or care) who won (we had to leave early). There was a team involved named the Devil Rays. What kind of satanic name is Devil Rays for a baseball team????

This is Jim, his brother-in-law Jed, and his nephew Leo. They were great and I really appreciate that they went out of the way to put up with a non-sports guy like me.

I go home around 3AM the next day. The train took forever getting back to NY. I had to explain to Jim that it was all uphill, so it ran slower. Just look at any map. Johnny B. picked us up at Penn Station and drove us home, which was very nice of him. We had to listen to a band called the Elevators all the way back up to Nyack, which I could have done without.

The next day I went over to see Larry and he gave me his Roadshow look of amazement when I told him the value of his antiques.

Here’s a picture of Zak asleep under the forsythia. He was not at all impressed.